Since the inception of life on this planet, every organism seemed to have an inborn instinct to travel. Some species travel for migratory purposes for better pastures while others travel within reasonable distances for the same reason.
Likewise we homo sapiens, much like any other life on Earth, travel like our fauna counterparts. Traveling these days for us humans is so ingrained that it is a necessary way of life. With the ease of transportation these days, everyone is a commuter.
But what is a commuter? Merriam-Webster defines a commuter as
“: a person who commutes (as between a suburb and a city)”
However in the course of our daily travels on public transports, you would be surprised to know that we come in various types that can be very easily classified as atypical archetype.
Don’t believe me? Let Yours Truly show you then!
The Opportunist -
Sometimes you get the oddball who upon finding that there are no more available seats, decides to improvise by sitting right on the floor itself.
Never mind that there are throngs of people all around you looking over your head, and certainly never mind how crowded it is and people have trouble getting on.
Afterall, your comfort comes first right?
Mirror Mirror On The Wall
Usually seen in the morning if the person manages to get a seat. Following which would the entire bag of toiletries be emptied out, and a meticulous grooming that would put a cat to shame would follow.
It’s really quite amazing. It’s like watching a reality television series of Makeover, where this ghastly pale thing with blurry features manages to transform into a relatively human looking female with distinct looking eyes, noses, cheeks and lips.
While generally this is more prevalent in the female of the species, Yours Truly have seen the male version of it preening away in the reflection of the glass windows.
“Metrosexual” indeed.
I’m In Love
Yes we have all seen them. The so-obviously-in-over-that-they-couldn’t-keep-their-hands-off-each-other type. Their love for each other is so great that it simply just overflows and they must shove it… I mean “share” their affections with the rest of the world.
“I mean why aren’t you happy for me? I’m in love! You should be happy for me right? Please don’t be jealous because your love life sucks and you just got dumped. Really. Be happy for me please… here… see I’m deep French kissing now… my love… oh my love… oh yes… touch me here…”
Darling!!! Get a room please!!!
Crash Test Dummies
These people seemed to be living in a separate dimension from us. They appear to be totally oblivious to everyone and everything around them. From screaming kids right next to them to the busy necking couple in the corner to even Mas Selamat doing a cha-cha dance right before them.
When you look at them, you get the sense that they are actually looking through you. Quite a scary thought. Perchance they are some sort of dummies?
Days Of My Life
You know the ones I’m talking about. Often seen in toll with a hapless friend. I’m referring to those who yak so loudly that you are forced to hear that their Aunt’s second cousin twice-removed’s colleague’s sister-in-law’s nephew’s friend’s brother is having an affair with some cross-eyed midget and is wanting to get married because…
Because we are so interested right?
And should the hapless friend accessory not be available for their daily broadcast, you can be sure the handy mobile phone would do just as well.
Sleeping Beauty
One of the most common sights in the train, this breed have truly mastered the art of snoozing while being hampered on both sides by strangers, and being surrounded by virtual strangers, and remain totally deep in slumber that nothing can wake them up. A bear’s hibernation is nothing compared to them when they can apparently sleep through some squalling kid three seats away.
Then there’s also the pseudo Sleeping Beauties who automatically go into their “sleeping” mode whenever a pregnant or elderly person comes on the train. There must be some narcoleptic aura emitting about from the pregnant and the geriatric folk that we don’t know about.
Maybe that’s why my head starts to get heavier whenever my grandparents start to talk about the good old days.
Jellyfish, Octopus and Sea-Cucumber!
Oh no no I’m not talking about some delectable delicious dish that we are so familiar with. I am referring to our next set of stereotypes, who somehow were born without a skeleton, but yet manages to hold themselves upright and function like a vertebrate.
These are the ones who commonly attached themselves lovingly to the pole like how a barnacle encrusts itself to the body of a whale. No matter how much you try to dislodge them, they remain obstinately plastered to the pole. Believe me Yours Truly have tried holding onto the pole wearing some fantastic sadomasochistic looking rings to no avail. Jellyfish simply leans onto pole and ring & spikes.
Evidently they feel no pain either. Very interesting species indeed.
The Saints
In spite of so much ugliness going on in the train, you can always be sure there will be a shinning beacon of decency in that someone.
This is the person who will willingly give up his seat for the people in certain conditions without fail. This is also the person who will not hog the tiny path and this is also the person who does his or her best to be as considerate as ever.
It is such people that make travelling in the MRT actually quite worthwhile.
Speedy Gonzales
You see this every morning and every evening. When the doors to the train opens, in or out they rush straight away. Absolutely nothing stands in their way of getting the glorious throne even if it means having to claw, elbow and shove anyone out of their path.
Woe betide if you get in the way; a stampeding herd of wildebeests could do lesser damage than these harpies.
I… I See… Dead People
There is something about the public transportation in Singapore that is unclean. And apparently most if not all Singaporeans can see ghosts. You might be shaking your head in disbelief as you read this part, but I assure you it is all very true.
How else can you explain that eerie emptiness in the middle of every cabin while the area immediate around the doors are more packed like sardines in a can?
Or Singaporeans have a seventh sense that the rest of the world do not have? Perhaps they can see “dangers” in the middle of the cabins, like H1N1??
So which stereotype do you belong to? Don’t be shy! There’s nothing wrong identifying yourself with any of those in the list. There is no shame in it! Really!
What about me?
Oh honey… of course I’m is The Saint! That goes without saying!
Till next time… this is Yours Truly signing off now!
this is great…..how about those people, normally “aunties” who would rush to a seat that is just being vacated, guard it, let it cool first before they sit on it…i dont know what is it about not sitting down on the bench….too cool off their butts temporarily?
how about those who would try to spread their legs wide so that nobody will sit beside them, thus giving them more space on both sides?
yeah those aunties.. i remember..they will use their hands to pat the seats a few times before they sit down.
Now if i ever take MRT ( though i seldom take ) , i scared people sneeze or cough. haha
i’m actually quite impressed by your inclusion of #3, that reminds me that good people STILL exists in singapore. cheers to all the saints, we love you!
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